I consider “Face the Fear” as a Song Project.
It’s not a just a song for me, the theme of fear is interesting me very much, I find it is very actual, connected with our contemporary.
What doesn’t allow us to be free and in harmony in this world?
Are our choices conditioned by some kind of fear?
It seems to me that we could live in this world as in a paradise, nature is giving us all that we need, but still we are enslaved by some latent power who continuosly makes fear and terror on us…
What do you think?
I am searching for help to solve this enigma and transfer the solution into the music…the song is not completed yet!
This song started almost 3 years ago during a collective dance-music session with amazing dancers and musicians; it was an extra-party after the In-touch contact festival in Berlin in a kneipe in Neukolln, can’t forget that night!
I think i never saw again in my life so many dancers and people dancing and improvising together with so much energy, our music was really much influenced by that.
It’s still vibrating with the memory of that body-groove…
Face the Fear
in your Bones,
You can’t control.
Face the Fear
in your Mouth,
all your Words
all your Fears,
let your Soul
ride the Wave.
Face the Fear
in your Bones,
You can control.
Now it became for me a field for a research project, I want to complete this song after beeing in contact with as many artists and people, to discuss the argument of fear on his different prospectives; I will take my time to arrange a new version of the song in the next future, taking influences from all the impulses i will received.
I feel, also, a new part with multilanguage voices will come in a certain point of the tune…(min 3.20)
I’m investigating about the theme of Fear with different disciplines artists, I want to ask philosophers and scientists or also random people their thoughts, feelings about Fear, in order to be inspired.
The different contributes and performances I will receive will be shown on this blog.
My idea is to have 6 months(or more!) of research and study, travels and meeting to produce a final orchestral version of the song “Face the Fear”.
I don’t have a budget to make the project full active… I already started collecting materials and suggestions, but there are so much things to buy (from a new camera to mics to document, a new harddisk, collaborators to pay…).
Please DONATE and SHARE if you like this project!
“The Baobab tree is like Wisdom , it takes many people to embrace it all”
In the following timeline I will publish all the contributes received by friends and collaborators about the theme of “fear”.
– 2 February 2017.
Charles Simmonds wrote two poems for the FTFproject via FB message:
My anxiety keeps me thin…
My frame staggers
with jaundice scarecrow feet
Imposing craven world
Light often burning brightest
Though closed eyes
Aggressive hues leave me often
Speechless in the ungodly
Distorted face of ground beef
Demanding unknowable bus fair
In a concrete German tongue
Pale skinned meridian ghosts
Bellow & squark
At subzero temperatures
In relentless winded
French frogs lips flapper & ferment
Spanish fractions howl incessantly
All horrific creeds of the scale
Twist the cogs of the churning
They chew cartilage
Drooling & drowning me
In deafening chanting masses….
& I am somehow supposed to know what to say !?
How to act!!?
How does one respond to such a race of sickening mutants ?!!
What part do I play?
Standing there with a shaking hand
I stammer rehearsed lines
That tumble like cutlery
Down the safety pins that hold my winter coat together…
My thick frayed winter coat
With broken zip
My sad green winter coat
With broken zip
& troubled mind.
Inner & outer war
Inner & outer war
The mild tears
Deeper & deeper down
The weight of impression
As long as he shall live
The child scared
Devoured by the shadow
The child changed
The fire feeds
Evil spirits claw
At his shaking torso
The rivers of a terrible sickness
Run in his blood
The years of child
There is no one left to blame
The child smeared
Black & blue
In the night
The child now grown
Casts a harrowing blackness
That only he can see
Memories & scares
He try’s to comprehend ….
I dream of being close
With my litter sister too.
I was supposed to have a FTF jam in Gammazita where to discuss and play with people about fear, but there was a mourning, a guy died, he was the leader of the Ultras of the football team in Catania, so they told me it could be undelicate to play music in the square on that day, so we moved directly to Palestra Lupo.
It was a good coincidence, Palestra Lupo is much bigger and the set was very theatrical, I set my instruments in front of a big blackboard…
Those are some records of that beautiful night:
there’s more to mix…
It was a very intense day for the project, Jens B Atelier, a multidimensional artist from Germany was in Catania, inspired by the Festa della Paura painted this manifesto
– 31 January 2017.
Interviews with Palestra Lupo’s people and some passengers.
– 30 January 2017. The “Festa della Paura“(Fear’s Party) is enthusiastically reached by the social associations in Catania! Gammazita, Palestra Lupo and Centro Polifunzionale Midulla are helping me to make a great one, I proposed the “Concertrazione” format, from sunrise to sunset. Next meeting to organize and improvise together is on the 2th of february in Gammazita. Click here for more infos.
– 24 January 2017. Cinzia Scordia posted on my FB wall this video about fear.
– 19 january 2017. I played a concert in Gammazita, and I presented the concept to the people and I manifest the intention to organize the “Festa della Paura”(Fear’s party) on the 12th of february.
During the concert I invited the people to sing and jam with me, first we did a funny version of Bambini Scatenati. Then I invited Yukarì Takahashi, japanese singer, to jam with me the song Face the Fear, and now we have a japanese version.
– 16 january 2017. Interview with Piero Ristagno, artist and register.
note: he sayd that he has no fears at all.
– 15 january 2017. A group of activist occupied a beautiful polifunctional center, in the heart of Catania. They are braves, here you go for the interviews, just click on the names to listen to our discussions:
more have to come….
– 12 january 2017. It is now 5 months since the project started and so many things changed into myself, after the first months of weird sickness now I feel really empowered; thanks to all the contributes of the people, that for sure, I have the possibility to have an external point of view to the argument.
It is amazing how much art can influence and change our lifes!
Now is the time to organize the next events, between Sicily and Berlin.
It’s on my mind the idea to proclame the “Fear’s Day” on the 12th of february.
– 5 january 2017. FtF photo session with Luca Guarneri in Aci Castello(Catania).
Luca Guarneri is a very good friend of mine, professional photographer and reporter, his eyes have been always very important to interpretate various moment of my life.
It was spontaneous to ask him to shot the “Mostri di Carta”(Monsters of Paper), those are the subjects of the picture I used for the single cover, but I shot them with my old smartphone, so obviously I was in need of new high resolution pictures done by a professional photographer.
You can find down to the timeline(5th april 2015) how do I ended up with those “Monsters of Paper”, that’s a funny story!
I met Luca Guarneri in the early morning and after a coffee we had an intensive discussion about fear, of course.
To shot the Monsters of Paper assumed a symbolic feeling for us.
Sometimes fears seems to be so big like monsters, but maybe later we realize they are made of paper.
It was very windly, we were by the sea, so difficult to not let the monsters flying away, they are made of paper…we had so much fun: – nooo! don’t let the fears fly away!!!
More pictures will come…those are just some selected ones.
Here is the link for the interview with Luca Guarneri.
– 30 december 2016. I played a concert in a little hall in Catania called Chilometro Zero.
I had the pleasure to play “Face the Fear” with my sister Serena Chillemi and my african brother Laye Senè. The atmosphere was magic.
Marco Maccarone, a guy who studies philosophy, with whom I spoke about the project few days before, came and gave me two little pieces of paper fully written with his thoughts.
It’s written in italian of course, I translate some parts for you:
“…we need to overcome this dualism between Thought and Emotion. Not accepting the one and rejecting the other (we are both at the same time), but trying to sublimate both, raising us as men; whole or non-fractionated.
We can try to give voice to our emotions, to listen this voice and learn who we are from that point of view.
If we limit ourselves to give only momentary relief to the emotions we will never understand, because the next moment the emotional state could be radically different. If we learn to listen to the voice of the emotions and to understand and contextualize their meanings, then and only then, we begin to understand ourselves.
Do I act out of fear? For utilities? For convenience?
What is so terrifying to condition my life? What is useful? It ‘s really useful or only apparently? I can sustain the loss of my mind for material gain that I could easily lose destroying all hope of regaining serenity?
The fears are many, often forced from the outside; by family and society, from our living conditions that affect our psyche often completely unaware…”.
– 28 december 2016. The project starts to be understood by some enlightened artists in Catania. Laye Senè, a great percussionist from Senegal, asked me to open the concert of his band, the Afro Family, playing the song in a very nice venue in Catania(Sicily), La Cartiera.
This is a smartphone video, shot by Nicol Sundari, dancer, who used her smartphone to record it.
-24 december 2016. the first semi-professional video, shot during the first “Symposium about Fear” in Berlin is finally online, edited by Giampiero Gangi. You can find and watch it below, 12 july 2016.
– 21 december 2016. Manuela Violet wrote a PM on my messenger:
when I realized fear should not be avoid,
when I realized that i need to cross it,
I started to live.
– 20 december 2016. After an interesting discussion with Alessia Volpe (student in social service) I decided to start a serie of interviews with random people about the theme of fear and other similar topics.
– 17 december 2016. Daniela Santocono, group and individual psicoanalist, wrote a PM to my messenger:
“Affronta la paura. Io interrompo il tuo sforzo mentre immagino un’ aquila che mi vola di sopra quando mi viene da piangere. I voladores* non si potranno più nutrire della mia paura perché io sono amore. Li ho lasciati disperati e presto se ne andranno via lontano. Face the fear diviene face the love. Anima tra le anime sei finalmente libera di volare.”
“Face the fear. I interrupt your strenght while I imagine an eagle flying over me when I feel to cry. The voladores* will not be able to be feed by my fear because I am love. I left them desperate and soon they will go faraway. Face the fear become face the love. Soul between souls you are finally free to fly.”
*voladores – obscure shadow, alien parasites.
– 2 december 2016.
The Olographic Universe.
I found this document really connected to my research about fear.
Infact fear is argued in this video, but from a scientific point of view.
We are able to create the reality through our counsciousness, but, when we are scared or we have silent fears living inside us, our organic system works slowly and lows his energy. The counsciousness almost turn off.
What does create reality? Informations and mass media.
Dear artists and free minds there around, please don’t stop producing art and media, it is really needed!
– 10 november 2016. I finally found a collaborator for editing the videos and the documentations. He is Giampiero Gangi, a young sicilian videomaker who is running with other friends a label called T.S.o (trattamento sociale obbligatorio).
– 7 November 2016. For the first time the project and the song “Face the Fear” are mentioned in a newspaper. It is La Sicilia, the Syracuse edition, the article is signed by Aurelio Caliri, who I met while playing in the streets of Ortigia(Syracusa). He is a 70 years old multidisciplinar artist, he composes music, writes books and paints. He wrote a beautiful review, it really impressed me and gave me a lot of encouragement to continue with my work.
The musician – Dario Chillemi, with his guitar gipsy in the streets of the world.
In the first part of the article Aurelio Caliri writes about my life between Sicily and Berlin, he describes brilliantly the situation where I use to play, the emotions my playing provokes to him and the audience. Then he names the song “Face the Fear”, that I was playing for him. He writes something about the project too, and he adds his personal opinion: he thinks that the song is already good as it is, and could be a pity to dilute it. Then the best words come, with a quote by Giuseppe Fava, a writer for the theater, register and journalist killed by mafia in the 80’s. Here comes the definition of Gipsy:
“To be Gipsy is the easiest and noblest way to use the life. The Gipsy is the one that has the heart as homeland, the horizon as border, as ideal the daily discover of the existence and his essential values: the space, the light, the trees, the birds, the rivers and the sea. The Gipsy is finally the one who is never alone, but advanced on the face of the heart, and enjoys and sings, free…”
Yes, I am, or, at least, i try to!
Also interesting is the contest in which the article is.
Page 22, Culture.
I am surrounded by this “Mystical tension of the salmist Francesco Butturini”, just beside the article is written “vis-a-vis with lord”! It’s not the first time they try to collocate me in this catholic aurea, also some catholic people already contacted me to support the project. I am absolutely not into the catholic religion, and I always had to face it as i grew up with this menthality (Sicily is really a catholic island), nevertheless I see it as a sign, and I don’t refuse any kind of point of view for the research. I know something will come out from it in the near future. On the right side (also politically I’d say) there’s Vittorio Sgarbi (welknown art critic in Italy) with his project about “Sea Landscapes” between nature and literacture. Dino Rubino, trumpet and pianist, my coetaneous, was playing brilliantly the piano for the event.
– 22 October 2016. “Symposium sulla Paura” in the “Palestra Lupo”, Catania.
It was very symbolic to have a symposium about fear in the Palestra Lupo, “lupo” in italian means “wolf”…eh eh!
It has been one of the most difficult concert/meeting I ever organized.
I had fever on that day, my vital state was very low.
To be honest, this happened immediately after publishing the single “Face the Fear” in august, I went sick in a strange way, I lost many kilos and my body was suffering a low state of energy. It is probably because I let many latent emotions and feelings subcounsciosly come to the surface.
This symposium has been the moment when I clearly visualized this process and, later on, I have been able to build up another myself, definetely stronger and more counscious, I think.
It has been difficult also because, even if I explained many times the people what was the idea of the symposium, a moment of discussion about fear on an artistical level, I’m sure they didn’t get it, they tought it were a solo concert.
Infact, the guys that were helping me preparing the space put the chairs in lines, not in circle. This was a big mistake, I felt the people were uncofourtable and they didn’t partecipate so much.
I was already superbusy with the soundcheck and I didn’t take care of this aspect. The day after the symposium I met a girl who was partecipating and she gave me an hard critic about the chairs position. I learnt it for the next time. Critics always welcome!
The first thing i did was to play the song of course, then I asked the presents to confess their fears.
I started, and I confess one of my main fears, the fear of not having money, to not be able to pay my monthly bills. This is really a common fear between us artists and freelancer, nevertheless, it is also the fear that makes us stronger and caparbious.
The best moment of the evening was for me when I asked a young boy to search the word “fear” on wikipedia and then to read it loudly while I was playing and improvising.
Another big mistake was to start early at 22, most of the people arrived later at 23.30 when it was already over… I went for a walk with some friends and I met a great artist from Catania, a guitarist called Mario Alberto Indaco.
I had a nice talk with him and he told me about Greg Braden and the ancestral fears.
I I took a note on my phone.
According to Greg Braden, there are 3 kinds of ancestral fears:
Fear of the abandonment.
Fear of the judgment of the others.
Fear of not beeing enough, capable.
– 16 October 2016. “Symposium about Fear” in a library, the Casa del Libro in Ortigia, Syracuse.
Not many people came, we were in four. It was really interesting anyway.
We arrived at the library and there was this children’s book on a shelf, right in front of us. “Fear is an emotion. Color, draw and DELETE your worries”.
Adriana Mauceri is a very sensible painter, she painted while we were discussing and i was playing.
She painted her body, it’s where our silent fears are!
There was a brave 15 years old girl, Arianna, I recorded her speech, I still have to study and analize…and publish of course.
Chiara, the girl laying on the floor, is studing acupuncture(needlestick) and massage therapy.
I got a lot of material at this point, it’s difficult to manage alone.
-8 October. Jali Diabate shared this page on fb and wrote:
“Avere paura è morire prima della morte”
“To have fear is to die before the death”
-4 October 2016, Alex Zampini wrote to me a private message on fb:
I classify fear in two kinds: rational and irrational. While the first one is reasonably functional to protect us from physical death, the latter is an ego-related defensive system of our mind, responsible to keep us safe from thoughts, old memories, past traumas and ideas that might change the idea of who we think we are. It hurts, to change. And our ego knows it well; for that reason it is easier to keep telling stories to ourselves and just surf the lid of the unconscious calderon. What if we interpreted fear differently, by observing it instead of reacting? By seeing it as an opportunity to get to know something more about ourselves, rather than set the auto-pilot and let our monkey-mind drive?
-25 september 2016, Marc Schlick wrote to me on facebook:
“maybe it´s the fear of the freedom of others, that keeps those people from being free…”
“people join groups and adapt rituals, only to not be alone. People loose all their fear if they´re a part of a group they anticipated, but many lose their personality…”
-24 september 2016
while playing in the streets of Syracuse i met two pilgrims, I played the song for them and we started an interesting discussion. One sayd that the fear starts from the possession, we pretend to possess things, but this is impossible, we can’t even possess our life, because death could come suddenly… this creates a huge contradiction in our souls: while trying to keep we lost our integrity and the fear of loosing grows up.
-12 august. I published my first single ever, the version recorded with Federico De Nicola, a young talented student of the SAE in Berlin, school for sound engineering. https://dariochillemi.bandcamp.com/track/face-the-fear
Never i couldn’t image in my life to even think about to publish a single. But in this case was the most obvious decision, due to the intensity of the project, and of course, for my financial situation… Then I start to produce those Download Codes, little cards where a link and a code are written there for you to get the song. The adventure “physically” started.
-12 july. I Symposium about Fear.
We were at the Lenin monument(Ernst Thalmann) in Prenzlauer Berg, Berlin, almost midnight, few trams and cars left.
Me, Dario Chillemi, with my guitar and some food, Hui Chun Lin, with her great energy and cello, Adam Har Zuf, percussions and didjeridoo, Renee Favretti, Multi-dimensional Healing Shapeshifter, as she defines herself, Mark-r-Mark with various object and ideas, he brought a tan of used coffee powder and a camera. Shyuenwen Shyu, a chinese architect came also to support us.
The plan was to perform in solo each one of us, and then to have a collective improvisation.
Some weeks before i was asked by a videomaker, S.C., to play and produce “Face the Fear” as videoclip for his webchannel. I took the chance to organize the first “Symposium about Fear” inviting some friends and collaborators. Unfortunately, lately the videomaker abandoned the project and left the videos uncompleted. I had to wait a couple of months to collect some money and find a new editor; and i’ve been lucky i found in Catania Giampiero Gangi, part of the T.S.O. collective, who is making the hard work…new videos of that night are coming soon!
– 15 maj 2016. I organized a long “Concertrazione”, from sunrise to sunset, collaborating with many artists of the Greenhouse Berlin.
I secretly started the project FtF and at 4 am. I announced it to few artists friends.
Enrico Ciaccona, Mike Hentz, Ciccio Marruggio and Adam Richards.
We were in my van and I interview my good friend and master Mike Hentz about the argument of fear. Adam was filming the interview but later accidentally deleted it.
Luckly I have a good memory and I can now transcribe all the informations he told me.
Mike sayd that “fear” is what is left from our animal side, we are still struggling with it and many of us don’t have the counsciousness of this emotions and live their life with it passively.
He told us that some years ago he partecipated to a Symposium about fear with many artists in Germany.
I asked him if he had fear, he answer no, at all.
There was a knife on the kitchen counter, I fastly took it and put on his neck and I sayd:
– Are you afraid? –
– Well, not really… – he sayd, and we all laughed very loud.
Once in the Greenhouse we recorded a very powerfull early morning impro session.
– 6 february 2015. Stefania Milazzo was one of the first artist to give spontanously an artistical contribute to the research, the concept of the project was not even still on my mind…
Her idea for the subject of the video is really inspiring, asking herself “who i am”, she, together with Steffi Gruzel, flute player and art therapeuter, realized how much important our animal/instinct side is. We tought we were human…but still!
– 18 january 2015, I asked on a post on Facebook to some friends to write their thoughts about Fear. These were their comments:
Sergei Klein – Fear is the sum of mind/body memory. it is an adversary, but in the right hands – an ally. (not ALLEY… but then again, maybe also an alley to something). it will help you get stronger. for myself I found out that I should do exactly what I fear the most. and opposite is true, if I avoid what I fear the most, it catches up with me and hits me sevenfold. god is fear, perhaps. fear and trembling.
Patrick Webb – Fear: excitement in its purest form.
Fear is an underrated emotion, which completely possesses and drives us to the darkest depths of our consious, verging on the brink of panic and exhilaration.
Fear is an attonement to our greatest attributes and our weakest demeanours, our darkest secrets and our happiest moments. A clarity above all is attained by fear, as it pushes us to think the worst.
Fear makes a man … Change his mind.
Fear is a state of mind, a unknowing of what is to come; of what is just behind that door; of what is under your bed; of what may become of you!
Fear is something made by man to control man.
Fear is real – only if you let it to be.
Fear controls the world beyond the men who say no.
Fear makes the little man stay down and out, forever to hold his tongue.
Fear is what makes our doors all locked. It is fear that we have to thank for the world today.
Fear and money go hand in hand, for fear of not having, not earning, might lead to you not living? It has you by your balls! Fear and money make the world go round, and round, and round.
Fear make your run; makes you cry; makes you understand mortality; makes you look away; makes you say things you do not mean.
Hui Chun Lin – Fear of war, fear of the multi media world, people forget to use there bodies to walk, to dance, to think, to create, to make revolution, to love.
Chiara Pulvirenti – la paura è una linea di demarcazione che noi stessi ci disegnamo intorno. dentro il cerchio ci mettiamo noi stessi (o forse solo una parte di noi), le persone che amiamo, i luoghi che ci sono familiari, tutto ciò che ci rende felici e sicuri e in cui ci rifugiamo quando abbiamo bisogno di sentirci coccolati. dentro il cerchio c’è quella che molti chiamano la zona di comfort. fuori dal cerchio c’è tutto ciò che ci inquieta, che ci destabilizza e ci rende nervosi e vulnerabili. tutto ciò che potenzialmente può mettere a rischio il nostro equilibrio: abbiamo paura di farci male, di sentirci soli, di perdere il lavoro, di invecchiare e di morire. ma c’è anche dell’altro. molto spesso oltre questa linea ci stanno cose che nemmeno conosciamo, tutto ciò che è ignoto, imprevedibile, irrazionale. molto spesso la paura è una linea tracciata male, troppo vicina ai nostri piedi perchè dettata dalla comodità, dalla pigrizia di andare oltre, dalle convenzioni e dalle imposizioni sociali. senza pensarci troppo abbiamo escluso fuori dal nostro raggio d’azione una distesa sconfinata di possibilità. o meglio siamo noi che ci siamo chiusi dentro questo cerchio che si chiama paura.
Renee sSance Favretti – Fear, the protector, the sabateur, the friend and the fo, the energy taker, the energy giver, the feeling that can make me go way too fast or way too slow, the feeling that I’ve fought so often against, or ignored, or not heard the value of, ……my motto, to feel the fear and do ” it ” anyway, led me to places beyond my fears, like walking over the fire moments of life, fire walking over the hot stones, walking in faith, walking always into the known unknown.
After reading their comments i wrote this poetry:
Le formiche non temono i sassi che cadono dalle montagne, neanche le api.
Quelle poi, sanno volare via.
Guardo in faccia una paura senza nome,
mi punta un coltello sul collo.
Non morirò senza il permesso della dea Shiva.
Lei quantomeno non mi ricatta ogni mese con i soldi dell’affitto.
– 5 april 2015. I bought for my son a book to build Monsters of Paper (Mostri di Carta).
I will use them later on as subject for the single cover.
Here is a video I did with my son on that day.
– 28 january 2015. I recorded the first version of Face the Fear in a little room in Neukolln(Berlin). I also produced the midi file for the score.
Walburga Walde, a talented german singer, was one of the first to listen the song, she sayd: this song is revolutionary.
Then she recorded her voice, giving me some new ideas for the melody.
– 14 january 2015. I found a little notebook on the floor, it was empty, I decided to collect the thoughts of the people in it. While going around i asked the people I met to write their thoughts or feelings, whatever it comes.